Recently, Honor Chatamah had their administration cleaned out, and replaced by a new super cool, hip administrator... NOT!!! He was everything but super cool and hip. His name was Iceman Halfride. Iceman was not a very nice guy. He seemed to enjoy ruining the lives of the student body he now presided over a little too much for the liking of many people, including his colleagues. With Iceman came a wide array of rules and regulations, every single one of which was more nonsensical than the last. As ridiculous as these rules were, they are not what my problem is with. My problem is with the fact that Honor Chatamah prides itself on the fact that it is one of the few schools that is truly run in a democratic fashion. They claim that every single thing that is done, is for the good of the students, when it seems that every little thing they do is done for the benefit of the administration and simply to spite the students.
From one of my contacts inside Chatamah I was told that one student by the name of Brew Ramden was suspended for writing some extremely brilliant essays about a fictional pride of lions. Another bunch of students were constantly reprimanded for sitting on a couch, (apparently it was one of those couches not meant for sitting on). At one point Iceman even decided to give a curfew to a large number of students simply for attending a birthday party for a friend of theirs.
I think that it is safe to say that one thing just about every democracy prides itself on, is its right to trial by jury. Now if Chatamah is so democratic, then explain to me this: Why did not one of these students have a proper trial? Why were their punishments decided outright by a fascist dictator who barged in on their school uninvited? I don’t know about you, but that sure doesn’t sound very democratic to me. How can it be that a democratic establishment such as Honor Chatamah keeps getting away with acting in this dictatorship-like manner? Simple; up until this point nobody has had the courage to stand up to Iceman and his fascist cohorts. This has got to change. With the coming of new students every year, comes many new opportunities. Opportunities to not only rid the school of its fascist leader, but opportunities to restore the school back to how it was before it was invaded.
I am not going to lie to you and tell you that it will be easy, because it will be everything but. Iceman has been known to fight long and hard for his causes, no matter how sick and obscene they are. I’ve been told that his wars have the tendency to be pretty explosive at times. This is not to mention the fact that Iceman has gotten a huge backing since he first invaded Chatamah. In a previous lifetime of mine I was in a similar situation to that which you are in. I had to rid an establishment of their evil leaders. The way I managed to do this was with a secret weapon developed by some Estonian scientists in the 30’s. It was called the annexation of Puerto Rico, or Operation X to those on the outside. It was originally devised as an extremely complicated football play to be used only as a last ditch effort to defeat their rival power plant’s football team. Through sources undisclosed, I gained knowledge of Operation X and decided to try it out in a real world scenario. My time here is short, so I can’t tell you the exact details, but let’s just say that their leader won’t be forcing rules upon anyone else for quite some time. He is now working on a tobacco plantation deep in the heart of Zaire in Africa where he is now getting to know how it feels to be ruled by a sick and twisted dictator.
My time here has expired, so please allow me to leave you with one final message. You the younger students of Honor Chatamah are the ones with the power to make a difference in the world of private schools for ever and ever. You have the ability to be put down in the books at the saviors of private schools around the world. Your example of not falling for the antics of a dictator, who will try to push himself and his rules upon you, will set an example for schools present and future. I leave you with one final warning. DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE ICEMAN!!! He is a ruthless man with no moral standards. Don’t let the fact that you are merely children fool you in to thinking that he will be easy on you. He will treat you no differently than he would a fully grown warrior. Remember, the annexation of Puerto Rico is to be used only as a last ditch effort, for its results can be devastating for you as well as Iceman. Now I bid you farewell, and wish you only luck and success in your future endeavors.
