Text Messages... Wow do they F%$# you over big time...

I recently came to the realization that text messages are the creation of none other than the Devil himself. I know you are all probably thinking either 1) that I am completely out of my mind or 2) that you want to kick my ass for saying such a thing about your precious text messages. Before I had this life altering epiphany I was as mixture of both the aforementioned groups. But now my dear readers I have seen the light and am now on the path of purity. Before you angrily click that nice fat X in the right corner up there let me present to you my case.

WHY TEXT MESSAGES ARE THE WORK OF SATAN:

1. There is no possible way to read emotions through text messages. You can have the intention of asking a simple question, and instead it will be taken as some sort of angry attack on the receiver. EX: Sent Message- Why did you call me yesterday? Perceived Message- WHAT THE F%$# WERE YOU DOING CALLING ME YESTERDAY?
2. There is no speedier way to get Arthritis and other variations of the disease than by repeatedly using your hands/fingers without pause... COUGH*... texting... COUGH*
3. It is extremely irritating to be sitting with friends relaxing in the middle of which one or more of said relaxing people takes out their cellular device and starts texting away with total disregard to the remaining more considerate people.

The list goes on my friends. I just thought it was my duty to warn all my loyal readers out there that our old buddy Lucifer was out to get us yet again. There is no need to thank me. Knowing that I have just saved each and every one of your souls from eternal damnation is thanks enough.

Until next time... yours truly ______.